Wednesday, 26 June 2013

Trevor's Dirty Doodles - Bloody Grate!

Ayup loves, 

I've been doodling again. Look...  

'Well That's Bloody Grate!' by Trevor the Lady Towel  & Major Gubbins
'Well That's Bloody Grate!' by Trevor the Lady Towel 
& Major Gubbins

...This one came about when Major Gubbins sliced off some of his finger in the kitchen last week. He is a clumsy love.

'Portrait of Trevor the Lady Towel' by TONE.

- Trevor the Lady Towel

Monday, 17 June 2013

Neighbourhood Sketch - Father's Day (Pollyanna's Flat)

Hello, TONE. typing. So, I was, er, doing some of my usual nebbing about the estate yesterday, and I wound up in the kitchen of Pollyanna Twentywell. Her brother Nicholas was round, and er, they were talking about baking a cake for their Dad, because it was Father's Day. 

I know next to nothing about baking, but some of the ingredients seemed a bit odd to, er, say the least. There was an awful lot of rat poison in it for one, but the erm, cream-cheese icing they made separate looked quite, er, delish.

'Pollyanna Twentywell' by TONE.
'Pollyanna Twentywell' by TONE. 

I hung around while it was cooking. I mean baking. They were talking about the fortune that their Dad had come into. Think it was something to do with, the er, shares or something. I don't really know, flies don't have currency of any kind, so it all goes over my head. They kept talking about a Will too. Not sure who he is.

'Nicholas Twentywell' by TONE.
'Nicholas Twentywell' by TONE.

There was a strange smell after a while, so I left. It didn't smell like burning, more like when Leroy is struggling to turn the oven on with a match.

Then I woke up this morning to sirens. Apparently there was a big explosion in Pollyanna's flat. Don't know if they were in it. Hopefully not, but they were very sleepy before I went. 

'Self-Portait ' by TONE.

- TONE. 

Friday, 7 June 2013


What's the METRO, a Roland TR-606 drum machine, and Bootsy Collins all have in common?...

...Well, they all helped inspire and shape this, the sixth song from my add-to monthly album 'Intimate Moments in Public Places'.

'Portrait of Major Gubbins' by TONE.

- Major Gubbins

Monday, 3 June 2013

Leroy's Birthday!

Ayup loves,

It were Leroy's birthday yesterday, which meant we finally got to give him his pressie, a load of videos that me and Major Gubbins found in this abandoned suitcase. We had a rummage through the rest of the stuff, but it were all pretty norribles. Smelt funny and was covered in funny red stains.

Abandoned Suitcase - Taken by Major Gubbins

In the morning, before Leroy got up, Major Gubbins made a little treasure hunt type doobury, you know, to make it fun love. He wrote little clues on post-its and stuck them around the flat, but Leroy didn't get it and went round chuntering about all the marks the glue had left on the wallpaper, putting them all in the bin, which luckily was where we'd hid the pile of videos. Ooh!

Leroy seemed really happy with the videos, so much so that he wanted to spend all day watching them. Minor Gubbins let him use the TV, on the condition that he could have it back at night, for a bit of blue, the filthy limpet.

The first video we watched were quite boring to be honest love, just a man cleaning guns, I usually like to see a man cleaning his weapon, and he was very thorough but it went on too long and I didn't like his blubbering. 

The second video was alright though, Baywatch, series one. Ooh! I'd like to be their beach towel and catch their pubic hair in my fibres. 

I were telling Gary the Slug all about it last night and this morning he turned up in this outfit. 

'Gary the Slug... Does Baywatch' by Trevor the Lady Towel
'Gary the Slug... Does Baywatch' by Trevor the Lady Towel

He is a handsome little slug.

'Portrait of Trevor the Lady Towel' by TONE.

- Trevor the Lady Towel